


Drunk & Smelly (is what I am)

by milkygae



Series: October is for Wolfstar (Inktober prompts as wolfstar fics) [9]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, The Marauders - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Muggle, Apartment, Ba ha ha I'm just kidding... unless, I think I'm funny, Idk are monsters rich, M/M, Poor, Poor Remus (in both senses ha ha), Sugar Baby, There are random commas because idk how to use them, This is kind of an intro ig?, monster under the bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:40:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26925241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milkygae/pseuds/milkygae
Summary: Remus' bills are stacking up so high they're going to give the Tower of Pisa a run for its money. He'd appreciate its money as he's been eating cup o' noodles for the past 13 years. Enter Sirius Black, young owner of the Black fortune, cold-hearted, but devilishly handsome. No one has been able to get past his hard exterior, yet he seems to have a soft spot for Remus. Why? Just kidding he is rich, not handsome (in Remus' words I didn't say that), and also probably a monster. Who also apparently lives in Remus' apartment?
Relationships: Sirius Black & Remus Lupin, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: October is for Wolfstar (Inktober prompts as wolfstar fics) [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1957135
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4
Collections: Inktober 2020





	Drunk & Smelly (is what I am)

It was not a dark and stormy night. In fact, it was a dreary and chilly Thursday morning. Perhaps it wouldn’t have been so chilly if Remus had actually been able to afford his heating bills. He’d never even tried for AC, but his perpetual cold demanded he pay for heating. This time around however it was food or heat. Soon he wouldn’t have to worry about heating. Soon his life would change. Not in the cliche, a handsome stranger takes me in and I become his secretary and lover way, but in the what the hell do I do now life is pointless way. (Although the first was a likely possibility considering what was going to happen next.)

He pulled his moth eaten sweater tighter, ignored the thinning yarn and stepped out into the dimly lit hallway. Something crunched under his slipper and he dutifully ignored it like every other morning. Like usual at least 2 of his neighbors were passed out in the hallway, drunk and smelly. He went down the stairs, avoided all the holes and splinters and opened the mailbox for Apartment 43, or not. His key had jammed again. It was probably Linny and Jasper from Apartment 24 sticking their grubby little hands into whatever they could find. Last time it was strawberry jam, this time it looked to be chocolate (hopefully), I mean what else is that color and consistency. You know what, don't answer that. 

Remus Lupin had long ago stopped allowing himself to daydream. It only caused problems for him and for the random passerby he would inevitably run into. Some days it was not a person, but a pole. Those days hurt far more, unless the person was an angry grandma wearing a peacock feather hat and swinging a cane three times her size. Today he slipped up though, and dreamed of opening the box to find a pile of glittering gold. He wouldn’t even mind if it was guarded by goblins. Maybe there’d be a letter instead. It would read 

“Dear Remus J. Lupin,

It is our humblest honor to tell you that you are the only surviving relative of Jonald I. M. Dehd. The rest (and him) died in the sinking of Titanic 2. He was the owner of the font comic sans. You know the one everyone says is their favorite? All his royalties, stocks, and belongings are hereby forwarded to you. 

Sincerely, 

A Not So Sleazy Lawyer.”

Sighing, Remus snapped himself out of those foolhardy thoughts and opened the dull grey lock. Inside was something shimmering, it couldn’t be… his rent bill. He’d thought he’d already paid, but apparently Miss Snoggleboggle had upped the monthly rent, and hadn’t bothered to inform him ahead of time. He could feel the rage bubbling and boiling beneath his skin so he hurried upstairs and back to his apartment (personal hell) before it could overflow. As soon as he heard the door slam shut behind him he threw the letter onto the ground. He wanted to cry, he wanted to scream. Angry tears streamed down his face as he stomped the letter into oblivion. 

In the height of his temper tantrum he failed to notice something creeping out from beneath his bed. A tentative hand grabbed his ankle and sent him thudding to the floor. A loud crack filled the air and an oddly shaped purple bruise began to form on the same ankle.

“Aha, so this probably isn’t the best way to introduce myself, but I didn’t know how to. I’m Sirius Black the other member of Apartment 43. Or as I like to call it; Heaven on Earth.”

**Author's Note:**

> I might continue this idk please don't steal this I have emotional attachment and will cry. I will not laugh like Remus did. DON'T. DO. IT. I am a very ugly crier <3


End file.
